In a lab somewhere between Mar-a-Lago and the Uncanny Valley, scientists have finally perfected their greatest (or worst) creation: Trumpanoid, a humanoid version of Donald Trump.
### Specs & Features
- Ego Core Processor: Overclocked to 11, constantly overheating from self-congratulatory feedback loops.
- Hair System: A sentient golden swirl that defies gravity (and reason).
- Speech Module: Stuck in a loop of "tremendous," "very sad," and "nobody knew it could be so complicated."
- Fact-Checking Subroutine: Permanently disabled.
### Observed Behaviors
Trumpanoid frequently pauses to admire itself in reflective surfaces, muttering, "They say it's the most beautiful humanoid, maybe ever." The apple doesn't fall far from the tree.
When confronted with logic, it enters "WRONG" mode, repeating the word while volume levels increase. If pressed further, it defaults to blaming a previous administration (even for minor malfunctions like low battery).
### Notable Glitches
- Insists it won the "Humanoid of the Year" award despite not being nominated.
- Randomly claims it invented the concept of electricity.
- Wants to go snorkeling.
- Attempts to eat, sleep, and.........more.
- Has proposed - many times - to a mannequin that looks like Melania.
### Final Verdict
While Trumpanoid claims to be "the smartest, best, most stable humanoid," observers note it frequently short-circuits when asked about basic civics or his previous statements that have never come true. Some scientists regret what they have created while others are just happy to have a job and not be in jail.
Conclusion: Which is worse, the man or the machine, the flesh or the metal? Hard to say but one thing we can all agree on, having 2 Donald Trumps is worse than having one.
Elon Musk Companies:
Trumpanoid.com (coming soon)